Ok,done some ‘1st time stuff ‘ lately:

1) Wrote lyrics for a song!ok,cheesy maybe but its fun to try!!!

I saw u in da past,

Now I see u, my heart still beat so fast,

Makes me feel like we have met before,

And now slowly more and more,

I know that I am sure,

Even though I try to stop my heart,

But when im alone, my world is dark,

I cant stand that we are apart.

So I just wanna let u know,

That I cant let u go,

Eventhough  I know that all that’s left is just your photo,

Looking into your eyes,

Is all I fantasize,

Baby just let me say, I miss u so…

2) See my whole family having fun together

Went for picnic on sunday at da beach. Sitting on da car,Mom’s grrreat cooking,sis’ss playing,mom & dad chatting..At tat moment,i felt really complete.Well,never had the chance to even stay together for long so this feels realllllly warm! It’s this feeling tat reassures me that this is the way want our family future to be. So, i’m ready to do anything to protect this family;)

Specially 4 u: I have no idea how or where our future’s gonna be, but one thing im sure is i want our friendship to b ike this,always. ’At down moments of life, it fels good to know i have a friend to rely on like u’ u said.Wel, it’s exactly how i feel.ALWAYS. Though i have good frenz here too but, Till now, I still feel like i’m going to school tomorrow n i’ll see u sitting on the canteen bench..Just to say,I Miss U. The great thing bout coming here is that i found a fiendship that ovrcomED time & distance!!!

 BACK TO REALITY: 112 days to SPM (I Knw im a nerd! ) I got a new ambition that i’ll have to work hard on!! finally,learnt tat when i have things to do: GET IT RIGHT & DONE! U don’t have much tomorrows to waste. 12 more days n the no.’s gonna be 2 digit!!! Do realise tat life’s a bit eventless but this is a great time to strive!to learn to discipline!So my ideal present life : Study hard & smart,exercise hard & hard,n stay fun! Whatever im doing, do it with passion!!

Sth for Krystal  Me: No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

GIVE YOUR BEST, cause this is once in a LIFETIME.

Distance never woried me,but 2day it suddenly came across ma mind. 1st person i tot of is her. If ‘it’ really happens,i really hope our friendship isn’t affected.So i think, wat if we start not to share?text?wat is left in the frenship? 

Well, then i called her up. We talked again like we always do. It’s been 1.5 year since i left. I learned that BFF are people tht u’ll need not to worry!true tat there’ll be akward moments bt its oni tat lil moment! I gotta say, i am truely blessed to hve a person like tat in my life. Looking back,from da time we shared our world, we were crazy!till da day i was leaving,da farewells, da talks,how we accepted living without each other….till today! really cant understand how i can feel like i never left when talking to her. Heard bout frens getting further,problems wit each other..Guess in frendships, we should never b too pesistant on things. We should go wit da flow a lil. but when u hav one tat u really believe in,be thankful n have faith in your friendship. Though we might miss out some details in each other’s lives,but we still play irreplacable roles in each other’s lives,no matter the distance.

Everytime she comes she brings exitement to our lives. Fav. thing mom’s here is the 1st meal she cooks for us.Her coming today seems like A new start for us. But who knows how the start is gonna be?From her, i learnt tat i wanna be a mom tat’s appreciated. She said she have nth to fea with her most beautiful thing with her,well,for me,it’s d same. n my most beautiful thing is MY FAMILY.For so long,we never meet much, but w all know she loves us like no one can. She came back for us at least, this will repay the way she left us. Dunno since when i start to treasure family like i ever did. I thought, no mtter how i succeed in my career i da future,on da moment before i die,i’ll regret if my family isn’t complete. SO!what you’re doing 4 ur family is forever worth it!!

Oh,read sth nice today. wats PLANNING? With my aim,i should rewind back step by step. eg: Aim to get all A’s 4 next exam. So a week be4 exam must get all subs ready.den 2 weeks b4 mst get xxx sub done. n 3 weeks before……

Life’s all about balancing!So have fun while you’re at it!!

Today’s special cause i know the faith i have for her is worth it.nt sure wat love is but it is definately selfless.for a peson like her to give things up,a lot of faith n strength is needed.im not sure wat’ll happen in da future bt i wan ma family to have the 1st priority.frenz,things,food(hah),fun,chances,memories i will miss a lot but still,family 1st.

Back to reality,spm is 100++ days away n im not half done!!!so ESTHER,GET FOCUSED! only by reading more,doing more,remembering more to get it!remember,slacking is forgetting your aim!!!

9/5 (187 days to SPM)

Random thoughts of today…..

1st, i figured out tat being nice is never wrong( believed this for 17 yrs n most of my years r happy!For ppl who think we’re gonna be easily cheated etc,r they happy? )   

2nd, I wanna have a character where anyone can be comfortable when with me!

3rd, ppl around u is a mirror of yrself. When u think others care, it’s because u care.

4th, thought bout wat bo shared yesterday(if we cant even study well,how to expect ourselves to go far?) n i understand tat study is sth tat can guarantee success if we work hard & SMART! plus,study to me is really a training of attitude. To success, knowledge is definately a must so y am i not input-ing as much as i can now??  

5th, how do i know when i’m expecting too much or too less from myself? This actually comes from my maid so i have to thank her, i guess. we see a sad person working hard without thinkin,no idea how much she dun have. But on d other hand,she might not feel anything like this because she doesnt think all that n she’s satisfied. For ppl in poverty,maybe having a KFC on special occasions can give them 90% of satisfaction ; for ppl who r filthy rich, having abalone for dinner can give them 70% of satisfastion. So wats da point of having so much n not satisfied?It’s more important to plan things according to reality. Human r animals tat r never satisfied,once i heard. We always plan a lot 4 our future,big bucks,successful career,perfect life. but can we actually do it?yes, some ppl say its those things tat motivate us to strive.I definately agree so i’ll read this post IF i worked 110% but still failed. So wat if u failed?u still have your healthy body to start over again. LEARN TO BE SATISFIED. So wat if today sucks? There’s always tomoro to make it a good one.  

6th, appreciate ppl who appreciate u!

                   7th, NEVER LET ANYONE STOP U FROM BEING WHO U ARE!!

Asked a man who went through surgeries,broken family,knowing he might lose his life in tat split of second: What is life to u?

From our conversation, i realised how gentle and fragile life is. Our life is maintained by a mere heart beat.Biologically,so many things going on n on in our body. So just one in those million reactions going wrong inside can end ‘life’. I never really thought bout it tat way before.We tend to take for granted tat life is ours. So what can ‘life’ really mean tat it can be so precious? From our conversation, I realised tat it’s the things tat we actually already have. It might be beside us, around us, far from us, our dreams, our hope, desire, sth we see every single day, even every single second. It’s in tat very second before we know we’re gonna lose everything(no matter good or bad)that we actually know wat we have. Seems like an answer with no answers?i think so too. But what da heck, i’m not gonna spend more time figuring y we must appreciate life,i’ll find out!

Yeah, admit tat have been a lil down,unable to concentrate, thinking too much+lost. but tq to this men,tq to Him,tq to this,that n a lot more…I’ll ENJOY.

Enjoy missing ppl…

                                                                  Enjoy working hard for my aim…

Enjoy making mistakes(cuz ther’re da best teachers)…

                                       Enjoy seeing the colour of life…     

Enjoy smiling through bad times…

                               Enjoy believing in myself…  

Enjoy believing tat life is beautiful…

                                                              Enjoy loving…

Enjoy going through bad times…

Enjoy being simple… 

                                Enjoy thinking too much…

                                                           Enjoy being doubtful & disappointed…

Enjoy being naive…

Enjoy hoping for success…                

                                                                Enjoy fooling around my teenage life…

                                                ENJOY BEING ME!

Life is unexpected,short,a twirl,unfair,risky,ups & downs….. BUT BEAUTIFUL.

D XTRAORDINARY BESTIE!

At times of doubt
choose to trust.

PS : I love my smile. my very simple smile.when i feel ppl out there think im a mistake, i know i will always see the very simple smile from myself. Feels as if i am always supporting myself. with that, i’ll think of the good things i still have in my life.n i will be able to go on…Because i CHOOSE to be confident, to believer, and to trust in who I am.

Reminder: I always LOVE your smile =) Because it’s sincere! and, we have the similiar smile! i’m proud of it. The charity card~

thx 4 calling me a bitch,n all those reallly hurting names.Cause they made me realise how much ppl need my happiness.They made me realise i need to cheer up more. they made me realise how much i can care. They made me realise how to see good in bads.i will never hate or scold them back cause i know that i cannot change any1 else,the only thing i can change is MYSELF…made me fee like cady in ‘meangirls’  I’ll never give up any of my friends for someone else,as i always say.But i’ll make a balance. i know what i should do to fix things.N I WILL.

PS : I love my smile. my very simple smile. when i feel ppl out there think im a mistake, i know i will always see the very simple smile from myself. Feels as if i am always supporting myself. with that, i’ll think of the good things i still have in my life.n i will be able to go on…Because i CHOOSE to be confident, to believer, and to trust in who I am.

SINCERELY, TO A…

        Sweet

      JOYFUL

    Elegant

     Spontaneous

             CrAzY

WONDERFUL GIRL,

            HAPPY

        SUPERB 17!!

What is the organ of the human body used to communicate?

Mouth?no.

Ear?no.

Eyes?no.

It’s the heart……..

*From that,i learned tat a lot of things is ok to be kept unsaid.It’s really nice to have a friend that u know will understand how u think,no need of telling,explaining,reasoning…because they just KNOW.*

‘Our camaradie is what makes me jaunty.’So when we’re not together,How can i?